Potentially Fabricated History

[learn_more caption="Beth is a spy."]Beth’s spy adventures have been immortalized in print. Here is an excerpt from a true story published in 1993 –

It was an aged looking warehouse/office building in a group of similar looking buildings, but when you went into one of the buildings you found a desk, an attendant, a rest room, and an overly near, mirror-polished elevator door.

“Ah, Miss Rossi.” The Attendant said, “Welcome! Here are your passes and papers.” As she handed the things to Haldira.

The back half of the room was a tangled mess of wires, computer parts, and various work benches blocked in front by a antique wooden desk. The desk was buried beneath an over-sized computer monitor that looked to be an old flat screen television. The other half of the room was the complete opposite: a open area with a modern desk looking towards the opposite wall.

She gawked at the back half of the room for a moment before she placed the box on the other desk. “Who’s that desk belong to?”

“Your Tech Support.” Gleeson said. “He’s on his lunch break.”

Haldira turned around to face the older man, “Is my tech support, considered ‘normal’?” she said with air quotes.

“Oh, quite in the ‘normal’ range, yes.” He replied.[/learn_more]

[learn_more caption="Beth is a Born-Again Christian."]When I met Beth, she was handing out bibles on the street corner at University of Texas – Austin. She would stand out there for hours at a time and yell about how Christ was our savior and Lord. I asked her why she handed out these bibles day in and day out and she told me that she once found Jesus in a pumpkin patch and he told her that the world needed more pocket bibles and that it was her job to supply them. From that day forward she handled out bibles every day.[/learn_more]

[learn_more caption="Beth is a superhero."]Beth was born in Sicily, Italy. When she was 5, her parents moved to America, residing in Brooklyn, New York. With age, her behavior became more erratic. She would often have violent fits causing things to happen with no reasonable explanation of their occurrence. Her parents being extremely pious people, they called their priest to come, thinking perhaps she was possessed. As the priest began his exorcism, Beth cowered in fear. This was not a good thing, seeing as whenever she lost control of her emotions, those unexplainable things would occur. When the priest started to scream, Beth screamed, too, causing the priest to be lifted into the air and thrown from their apartment. Her parents blamed it on demons and ask the church to intervene. Beth was raised in the Roman Catholic Church by Father Michael, a specialist in relics and the supernatural. She never saw her parents again. They mysteriously died when Beth was 15. Beth is now 27 years old and is well educated. She is fluent in numerous languages and wants to utilize her powers against the forces of evil. [/learn_more]

[learn_more caption="Beth is a relic."]Miss Nelson is a relic from a forgotten era. Nobody is quite certain of her origins however, there are hints and subtle nuances in historical documents that point to her involvement in one form or another. For example this excerpt from a diplomat to ancient China clearly shows her masterful leveraging of local beliefs for her own amusement; “Their strange manner of unarmed battle devotes much time to avoiding manhandling by the demons…” Clearly the work of one Beth Nelson. [/learn_more]

[learn_more caption="Beth is a conqueror."]Born of noble blood, Beth began her reign as Empress of Bensonhurst. Soon after her ascension, she led her army of minions forth and vanquished all the Apple Kingdom, culminating with the capture of lands of Lord Manhattan.

From her throne she now rules over the lands of the Flower Kingdom, formerly ruled by Prince Mouse, and the vast expanses of the Lone Star Dominion. As the years have passed her lust for conquest only grows. Soon, all will be her subjects.

LONG LIVE THE EMPRESS! [/learn_more]

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